


if at first you don’t succeed... (just give up)

by dame_de_la_chance



Category: X-Men (Alternate Timeline Movies), X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: :/, Angst and Humor, Family Drama, Family Secrets, Gen, LMAO, Lots of Cursing, Mentions of religion, Not Beta Read, Not Canon Compliant, They Are Friends But Like Asshole Ones, i don’t even know what to tag this as, mentions and appearances of others, mostly humour but like. this is mystique, shes brooding, well. it does have Kurt in it.
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-27
Updated: 2020-01-27
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:33:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22427887
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dame_de_la_chance/pseuds/dame_de_la_chance
Summary: Peter and Raven make a deal: Peter will tell Erik that he’s his long lost son if Raven tells Kurt she’s his long lost mother.Suffice to say, nothing quite goes as planned.
Relationships: Pietro Maximoff & Raven | Mystique
Comments: 6
Kudos: 56





	if at first you don’t succeed... (just give up)

Mystique was watching him with those shielded yellow eyes, protected with walls he didn’t care to penetrate, out of both respect and fear of what he’d find lurking beneath. He was no telepath, and frankly, they didn’t have a good enough relationship to warrant him even trying to psychanalyse her, so he didn’t. He wasn’t sure he would even want to. 

Either way, he caught Mystique’s attention, which meant nothing good. He was about to be lectured for a prank he had pulled (how to fuck did she learn about the car jacking incident, he had barely just pulled it off), or she was going to ask him about his dad, and that was infinitely worse. He’d much rather be lectured for five hours about why stealing is a real shitty thing to do than listen to her speak in her Dissapointed In You voice.

Besides, she’s a fucking hypocrite.

“Peter,” she begins, her voice too calm and collected and completely unreadable. “Let’s take a walk.”

‘Let’s take a walk’ was a codename for ‘we’re gonna have a chat, but really I’m just going to reprimand you about some shit you pulled, and Jesus Christ, I shouldn’t have to do this, you’re a fucking adult now, man up’. He’s had a lot of experience with her ‘walks’ by now.

“Actually-“ He drawls out the word, just to annoy her at being put on hold- “I have like, piles of homework to do, so...”

She grabbed his wrist in a tight hold, ensuring that he won’t run off, and he cursed. He could feel his blood circulation begin to get cut off, her fingers feeling like a noose around his wrist. 

“No, you don’t.” She squints at him as she dragged him along like a sack of potatoes; with immense ease, disdain, and a lack of gentleness. “I’m a teacher, I know when you have homework.”

“Listen, if this about stealing the keys to the Professor‘s car, it wasn’t even me.” It was, but it wasn’t like he actually used the car. He can run faster than a bullet, what the hell did he need a car for? No, he did it on a fucking dare, because Scott Summers was getting a bit too cocky, but really his pride had been manipulated so the group of teens could get a car and go on a midnight drive.

He wasn’t going to admit he got outsmarted by a bunch of high schoolers.

“What?” She didn’t know then. “Whatever, we’ll talk about that later. Did you tell your father yet?”

Fuck. So it was going to be the dad lecture. “You damn well know the answer.”

“It’s been months, Peter. He deserves the right to know.”

“That’s rich, coming from you.”

She squinted at him. They were in the courtyard now, but thankfully it was completely empty. Classes were in session, but neither of them taught this hour, and Mystique decided to crash in on his free hour.

“What do you mean?”

“You’re a hypocrite.” He was feeling smug, about to point out how fraudulent all of her lectures were when she didn’t even follow them. “Here, let’s make a deal-“

“No.”

“Hear me out, okay?” She nodded at him to continue, though she looked as if she knew she would regret it. “How about this: I’ll tell Magneto I’m his long lost son if you tell Kurt that you’re his long lost mother?”

A pause.

Mystique’s eyes flickered, and surprise ripples across her skin like she was using her shape shifting powers. Quickly, surprise gave away to anger, rage, betrayal, and a whole slew of emotions that Peter knew were negative and were only seconds away from murderous.   
Shit. Maybe he should think before he speaks. Mystique is going to kill him.

“How the hell do you even know that?” She settles on, hissing. With her already reptilian look, she appeared even more snake like, with her venomous glare and her hisses.

Peter regrets being born. “Uh....”

“Spit it out, or I will make you spit it out.”   
She will go through with her threat. Thanks to his speed, eavesdropping is a very easy thing to do, and he rather has a knack for it, and so he’s overheard all the rumours about her past. He knows she could gut him like a fish, and while that’s simultaneously really terrifying and also kind of a turn on, it’s mostly really terrifying.

“I eavesdropped on a conversation between you and Hank. It wasn’t like, on purpose, but I just happened to be there when you guys were talking and like, when I heard you talking about Kurt, of course I was interested, ‘cause he’s my friend and all that, so I-“

“Like Hell it wasn’t on purpose.” She got him there. “Jesus Christ, privacy is a foreign concept to everybody at this school.”

For starters, there’s two telepaths who can read your mind at any moment. If that wasn’t enough, people loved to gossip, and news travels faster than Peter in this school. Plus, she was one to say that, considering she herself was nosy and sticking herself in a situation she doesn’t belong in (ie, Peter and Magneto).

He did not point out how it was a mistake for her to stay here thinking she would ever have privacy for those reasons alone, however, considering he did value his life.

“I’ll tell Kurt if you tell Erik.” It was muttered, almost hesitant.

“Hey! I proposed first!”

“Seniority overrides that!”

“What? No fucking way! First come, first serve!”

“Erik deserves to know that he still has family out there-“

“And so does Kurt!”

They stood across from each other, their hands on their hips in near mirror of each other’s pose. It was almost comical, the way they were standing off, like they were two friends in a b-rated chick flick that were squabbling over some boy, except Mystique looked a bit too bloodthirsty, like instead of pulling at each other’s hair, she was going to slit his throat.

“Okay,” Peter commended, because he’s a peace maker, and he also is not intending on meeting his maker at anytime soon. “Okay, how about this: we tell them both on the same day?”

She huffed, glancing at the ground, contemplating his words. “I... suppose.”

“Thursday?”

“Right. We’ll do it at the same time, right after classes.”

“Right.”

“Right.”

They stood there for a moment, and regret instantly swept into both of their bones, because shit. Why did they agree to this?

“Alright... see you Thursday...” He hated how awkward he sounded, and wanted nothing more than to race out of there. What was stopping him other than social conventions?

“Right...”

He raced off, slamming into his bed. Ignoring the crack of his bed frame, he picked up his pillow, and smothered himself with it, screaming as loud as he could.

-

Thursday rolled around much too quickly. Peter was on the edge of his seat all day, bouncing with an energy level that caused concern to all of his friends, afraid he might burst.

“Did Jubilee sneak you coffee again?” Scott asked, his eyes unreadable as always, his face screwed into a tight frown. Peter had been banned from coffee after the disco incident, a time Peter did not want to remember. Admittedly, giving caffeine to an already high energy speedster wasn’t a good plan to begin with.

“Uh, nope! Nope! I’m a-okay! Perfectly normal!” He was drumming his fingers so fast he could feel them begin to phase through the table.

Kurt raised an eye brow. “You look as if you are on a sugar high.”

“I’m fine!” He stressed. He tried to lean on the table, but instead, his hand phased through, and his chin smacked against the table with a loud thunk. “Shit.”

Jean Grey was watching him with analytical eyes. She’s told him before that reading his mind was near impossible, considering the speed at which he thinks, and usually she can only get snippets of his thoughts, but it seemed to be enough considering the look on her face.

“You’re nervous,” She simply pointed out.

“I’m literally like, the most relaxed person here. I’m so cool that the sun wouldn’t be able to melt me. I’m ice cold, I’m untouchable, I am completely relaxed-“

He happened to glance up just in time to see Erik enter the courtyard, walking side by side with Charles. He choked on the sandwich he was eating, his leg phasing through the bench he was parked at after he bounced it just a bit too hard. He fell out of his seat, and didn’t bother getting back up, deciding to just lay there and wallow in self pity for a moment.

“Jesus, are you having a stroke?” Jubilee asked, hitting his back. 

“Shit- fuck-“ He coughed hard, and managed to be noisy enough to catch Erik’s attention. He glanced at him for a split second, a disappointed but concerned expression in his face, and Peter smothered himself in his hands.

He was fucked.

-

Lunch passed by both too fast and too slow, as did the rest of the day. He let out a slight squeak when the bells rang, signifying the end of the day. He was not startled, of course, he was just... yeah, he was taken off guard because he’d been stuck, fretting about in his head.

He zipped out of class before anyone could say a word, and took a few laps around the school, trying to work of the tension in his body. It was on his 86th lap when he finally stopped in front of the bench by the lake. 

Erik was sitting there. Peter has passed him by while he was on his decompress run, and wow, the run had done absolutely nothing, because butterflies were rioting in his chest, and he felt very close to puking them all up.

“Peter,” Erik greeted absently, glancing up from the book in his hand. “What are you doing here?”

Peter clenched his fist and sat down next to the man. His father. He needed to stop wussing out. He could do this. He could do this.

“I have something very important to tell you.”

Erik looked intrigued. “Oh?”

“I’m...” _Come on Peter, you can do this! You’ve been wanting to shout this to the rooftops ever since you found out! He’s your dad, just spit it out! You got this! You got this!_ “I’m lactose intolerant.”

He did not have this.

Erik squinted at him. “That’s the important something?”

“Shit, no, I’m-“ he stumbled, his mind working too fast, even for him. It was like his brain cells were racing around his head, bumping and tripping over each other like go karts. “I’m also gluten intolerant. I only ate that croissant you gave me last week because I was too embarrassed to say no.”

Jesus fucking Christ, he’s digging himself a grave that’s way too fucking deep. It’s like he hit rock bottom, and decided to bring a pick axe to keep going.

He rubbed his forehead. He had to stop this shit show while he could.

“Okay, uh, now that you know my dirty secrets... bye bye!”

He ran straight into his room, and didn’t even bother with the pillow. He just screamed.

-

Mystique had been counting the minutes until school went out. She was supposed to be calm and cool, but every time she saw Kurt pass through the halls, every inch of her clam dementor became shredded like a cat clawing a newspaper.

The bell rang while she was lost in thought, and she absently realized she was about to miss her chance to connect with her son. A part of her didn’t really think Kurt was missing much.

“Kurt!” She called, watching as he began to exit with his friends. He spun around, surprised, and she waved him over. “I need to speak with you.”

He obeyed, sending a confused glance to Scott, and planted himself next to her. He looked anxious, and was clearly trying to think of something he’d done wrong to warrant him staying after class. As if he could do anything wrong. This boy was a fucking saint, and Mystique knew that he had no bad bone in his body. 

“May I ask why you called me here?” He inquired. His big eyes showed his nervousness, and she hesistated.

“I have something important to tell you, and I’m sorry that I didn’t tell yo sooner. It’s just, once I figured it out, I just had such a hard time processing it, but it was unfair of me to keep this information form you.”

She had his full attention now. He stood up straighter, his eyes watching her in deep concern. His tail swished slightly, his hands stinging anxiously. He looked so innocent, like a scared school boy about to be shunned for something he didn’t do.

She rubbed her forehead. She needed to hold it together. She needed to do this. Just say those three words. ‘I’m your mother’. It’s easy. It’s fine.

“I’m...”

She trailed off as she took another look at him. Oh god, she couldn’t do this. This boy was pure, a sweet angel, a darling who has quite literally never done a bad thing in his entire life. Raven has done terrible, god awful things in her life- blood trailed her like a bride’s white dress. She could not bring herself to impose her impurity on him, because by god, he was the most pure thing she had ever made, and she hadn’t even raised him. He turned out fine without her. Who was she to fuck him over? To sully him with her violence and anger and repression and baggage?

“I’m colourblind.”

She winced. Shit.

“I... don’t follow?” He looked genuinely concerned, like he was worried she was going to have a stroke. At this rate, she might.

“Uh. Yeah. I’m colourblind. This entire time I thought you were... orange.” She physically restrained herself from slamming her head against the wall. Why was she still talking? Why did God not take mercy on her and just smite her where she stood? Kurt always babbled about God’s generosity- where the hell was this merciful figure, because right now she was suffering, and she was certain God was laughing it up above.

“Oh...?” Kurt sounded completely bewildered. This had clearly taken a course he didn’t plan for. “I suppose... that must be embarrassing...?”

“Alright.” She straightened. “You can leave.”

“Are you sure? You look...” He purses his lips, clearly trying to remain polite while expressing his uncertainty. “... very ill.”

“Please, just go.”

He hesitated, and when she waved him off, he slowly crept away from her side. She collapsed onto the desk, slamming her head against the surface, groaning into her piles of essaies.

That could not have gone worse.

-

“So.”

They were seated across from each other at a picnic table, the casualness of Peter’s word dying as the tension between them cressendoed dramatically.

“How’d it go?” He prodded. “Do you tell him?”

She plastered on a fake smile. “Yes. Did you?”

“Yep.”

They sat there in silence, stewing on the disasterous conversations they had gone through. They replayed the scene, over and over, until Peter sighed and flopped his head onto the table, groaning.

“We’re both lying, ain’t we?”

She laid her head on the table, and joined him in the groaning. “God, we’re fucking hopeless.”

“Why is this so fucking hard?” He rubbed his face. “It’s just three words. ‘I’m your son’. Or ‘I’m your mom’. Why can’t we just say it?”

She just groaned louder. Thankfully, the courtyard was empty, and should remain so. The other students were either in training or were going about their after school activities. For now, they had time to themselves, but Raven still felt slightly exposed.

“Hey, here’s an idea.” Peter bit viciously into a Twinkie She was certain he did not arrive with. “We pull a switcharoo. I’ll tell Kurt you’re his mom, and you’ll tell Erik I’m his son. It’s a win-win!”

Despite the temptation of the offer, Raven replied, “Peter, that’s the worst idea you’ve ever came up with since I’ve met you, and that’s saying something, because you’re full of shitty ideas.”

“First off, rude, second off...” He pouted. “True...”

“Well, what do we do? We can’t just wallow here, we have to do something. We have to do something. They have a right to know, after all.”

“Yeah, but can’t that wait until later?” He chuckled nervously. “Like, ten more years later? After I get murdered later?”

“Murderered?”

“Trust me. I’m not gonna die until someone kills me.”

“That’s usually how it works, yes.”

“We’re off topic!” He but into another Twinkie. “God, why are we like this?”

“We’re scared of rejection.”

He dropped his Twinkie. They stared at each other for a long moment, soaking in her words. “Way to drop a loaded bomb.”

“We’re both feeling insecure, that we’re not enough for them. I mean, they’ve been going their entire lives without us. Maybe they just don’t need us.”

Peter remains quiet, chewing thoughtfully. It’s interesting, because they both have the same issue but from different perspectives. He was the son that knows, and she was the parent that knows. Different, but essentially the same.

“Yeah, I guess it’s probabaly better for them if we didn’t tell them. I mean, I know Erik would be disappointed to have me as a son.”

“That’s not true.”

“Oh, it is. I’ve watched him watch me. He hates me.”

“I think Kurt is scared of me.” She sighs. “I mean. I have killed people.”

“Magneto killed people but I’m not scared of him.”

“Peter, that’s nice, but like, your perception of mortality and ability to fear for your life is skewed.”

“Rude! I’m just trying to help.”

“Yeah.” They both sigh at the same time. 

“But seriously, Kurt isn’t afraid of you. He likes you a lot. Says you’re his favourite teacher.” Peter gnaws on his Twinkie as Mystique watches him in intrigue. “He adores you. All the little munchkin heroes do, and especially Kurt. He thinks you’re a hero.”

“But I’m not. And I just.... he has a good life now. I don’t want to ruin it.”

“You couldn’t possibly ruin it. You’re not a bad person, you know? I mean, sure, you’re really bitchy, but like, you’re a genuinely nice person who’s just trying to figure out the best way to help people. You’re a lot less murderous than when you started!”

“As for pep talks, this is probably the worst I’ve had, but it was actually fairly helpful.” Peter smirked. “You know, this shit goes right back at you, too. Your dad doesn’t hate you either.”

“He definitely finds me embarrassing.”

“He finds you funny and witty and bizarrely clever. His words.” His eyes twinkle at the praise. “He thinks you’re silly but hey, it’s equally important to have someone cheer the mood up as it is to be powerful in battle. Which, you’re also super strong, and he admires your potential. He does like you.”

“Huh. That’s.... actually really uplifting.”

“Sure, you’re weird, but you’re not annoying. It’s hard for people to hate you.” She squints her eyes at him. “Not for me though. I do hate you. But others like you a lot.”

“I see you’re even worse at pep talks than I am.”

“Listen. I guess we’re both....”

“Lovable?”

“Yeah.”

They sit in silence again, contemplating. A new sort of determination begins to wash over both of them, this time genuine and almost excited. 

Peter jumps to his feet. “Hell yeah! Let’s try one more time!” Mystiques attention darts to something behind him, but he doesn’t notice even when she begins to put a finger to her lip to warn him to shut up. “Their lives are gonna be much cooler when they know that I’m Magneto’s son and you’re Kurt’s mom!”

“What.”

“Peter?”

Uh oh.

Peter spins on his heels to find himself face to face with Kurt and Erik. He can feel a simmering rage emanate from Mystique as she slaps a hand to her face.

“Hey, what are you doing here?”

“Mr. Lehnsherr approached me because he was concerned about your behavior. I mentioned that Mystique has also been acting rather erratic so we decided to go look for you both, and we saw you out in the courtyard, and, I’m sorry, did you just say Mystique’s my mom?”

“You’re my son?”

Uh oh.

Peter sends Mystique a sly smile. She glared at him, but he simply shrugs. “I guess we have some explaining to do.“

**Author's Note:**

> is peter a teacher? is he a student? who knows! not him!
> 
> i hate the movies because the timeline is real fucked up BUT I love it because I love pietro and Kurt
> 
> watched dark Phoenix, said no, and wrote this.


End file.
